Is anyone impressed by anything these days? I mean really… I feel like I have already seen it all because of the internet, but for what it’s worth – getting a sick blowie from a groupie whilst performing on stage is probably the biggest G move of 2013.

Props to Daniel Brown.

For once in the history of the universe, DJ ON&ON was on top of life, while Sleezy Trees hit rock bottom.

After I was done hosting an A.Z.  show, Trees saunters into the club as it’s closing down and demands drinks at the bar.

I identify my friend is in trouble, and do what any concerned friend would…exploit his pain and anguish on a radio show for the world’s entertainment.

ON and Trees head to Clear Channel headquarters to record a drunken emotional perfect storm of a psychiatry session called SHIT SHOW Episode 7.

In all fairness, Trees has rebounded incredibly since this show, landing a high profile corporate job, and settling down in exotic East Bumfuck North Carolina.

Nevertheless, savor this moment in radio history when things were much simpler.

If so, your reward awaits. I’m gonna stop interviewing people, because I’ll never be able to top this. From Passion of the Weiss.

Brent Musberger going literally h.a.m. over Alabama QB AJ McCarron’s GF.

BTW – AJ McCarron was also rumored to have smashed Kate Upton.

Is Trinidad James the first dude to take something from white culture and steal it for the blacks?  You know I’m talkin about that Molly.

Now, blacks usually are the trendsetters for us whites.  It’s always the other way around with us whites leeching off black culture. (My wigger pic below is a prime example of that). But Molly has been around at Phish concerts for years now.. (we used to call it MDMA). Just recently are blacks using it.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but the last thing blacks stole from us whites was the internet. And you see how that turned out? (Amazing).

I’m thinking we might have a serious issue on our hands with the Molly shit. Just look at how it affected my old apartment when I brought a bag back for New Yurrs.

That’s some Thizz face shit if I ever seen bout it. Granted.. no one there is black, but these are all whites that are easily influenced by black culture. It’s almost the full circle effect. They would never do Molly if Mumford and Sons were strumming about it on a guitar, but now, it’s the new crack (literally!).

Watch next year when Weezy or Based God starts rappin’ about heroin and bath salts.. we in for it.

We already have shirtless whites popping up on the radar.. a sure sign of the Chief Keef “shirtless black“ phenomenon from 2012.

I can’t really compete with Treez or On&On’s stories unless I’m getting mugged by tweens, but since I paid my $80 to help “de-AIDS” this site, Im compelled to write something. Something concerning my new Treez-less life and to let people know JTTS still exists. If there were a single “No Homo” key on my keypad, I would breeze through this piece in half the time. After 7 long years, my common law marriage to Rob Reilly has ended.

No more dudes night out. No more picking him up from jail. No more loud sleep apnea snores rumbling down the hallway. No more us seeing each other covered in blood (NH) from various forgotten debauchery. Our path to manchild-hood is now a separate, lonely trail through life (NH).

The first thing I noticed upon his departure are all the things that I’ve inherited from this situation. All the crap that you suddenly realize is yours when a longtime roommate leaves you. Like this stuff here:

See anything you like? Could be for sale. The second thing I realized is I’m old as hell. My household is now made up of young, fashionable whipper-snappers (NH) in their early 20s. My girlfriend recently told me she’s had the same phone number since sixth grade. JKFGT corrects my spelling of PVRPLE and sends me rap music I’ve never heard of. Jokes fall on deaf ears.  Star Wars is something they may get around to watching at some point. The list goes on.

And there you have it. My youth was fun while it lasted, but everything comes to an end eventually. Guess you’ll see me swinging from the ceiling fan soon. (BTW this is a desperate cry for help)…..sooooo……yeah……cool story bro…

Wishing A. J. Wright was still open.

BEHOLD. THE GREATEST SHOW ON EARTH. GATHERING OF THE JUGGALOS 2012.

During the festivus, Bushwick Bill built with Three 6 Mafia as Master P left the stage.

A majority of the content is a back and forth circle jerk of compliments and praise, but what caught my attention was a drunk Bushwick participating in an event that is the crown jewel of debauchery off the heels of an attempted career in Christian rap.

Would Mason Betha cavort with thousands of pill-popping, Vodka drinking, Pagan loving, unsafe sex having Caucasians who smell like months of unwashed wet dog?

In this video, we also get to meet Bushwick’s manager/daughter, who booked her dad for this gig.

Peep when Bushwick was all bout rappin for the Lawd.

Here’s a change of pace…some heterosexual-friendly rap music embracing the good ol’ days of objectifying women. That Prodigy gay shit still got me fukt up.

This video is brought to you by the awful folks at Chick-Fil-A. Leggo.

While most were out grilling on their porch for Memorial Day, these guys were just straight up eating people.

First was Rudy Eugene. It’s a long way to rock bottom, but I guess hit it on Saturday when police responded to an eyewitness who saw him eating another man’s face near the MacArthur Causeway in Miami.

Police, responding to a call about two naked men fighting on a bike path, found Eugene ripping off pieces of flesh off the other guy’s face. They tried to get him off but he growled at them and continued eating. The officer shot him once, but apparently it had no effect and he fired off at least six shots before the guy died.

The victim’s whole face was ripped apart and he’s in the hospital but the hospital is apparently not releasing any information about him.

The local news is reporting that Eugene ate the man’s nose and his eyeballs while tripping on LSD and he was body temperature was skyrocketing because of it, hence him being stripped down.

Surveillance camera footage only shows two pairs of naked legs lying next to each other by the freeway with the bridge obstructing full view.

LSD that turns people into flesh-eating zombies? Or is that just a convenient excuse for something more sinister? Makes you want to watch X-Files reruns or play Resident Evil.

Meanwhile, in Japan…

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Judge Wade Mccree wins the “Settin Niggas Back 50 Years Award” O’ The Week much to the delight of Detroit’s Fox News. His honor is out chea sexting bishez and finds nothing wrong with it.

It’s Cold In Teh D.

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The key to scoring pussy on Craigslist is having the ability to create a great title line. You have to be on some Madison Avenue marketing shit to be an effective cocksmith on Craigslist.

What’s the tag line that will entice a complete stranger to open her vaginal canal to another complete stranger?  Something that says witty, intelligent, manly, non-threatening, and confident.  For instance, my most successful title line to date garnered me twenty five responses. By twenty five, I mean from actual women…I’m not counting the other forty five responses coming from gay dudes, trannies, bots, and straight dudes who want to bro up over a “straight” jerk off session.

Before I get to my title line o’ the century, consider this; Craigslist’s Casual Encounters is the reception area where the freakiest mufuckaz in your hometown gather. To some degree, everyone up in this bitch is a sexual addict seeking some sort of fix.

Look at it like attending a house party where you might want to cop yourself some trees. As you ask around, someone may say, “I aint got weed, but I can hook you up with some coke.” The next man may have some shrooms for sale. You may have to go through five oxy salesmen before you find yourself what you’re looking for. In the same way you shouldn’t get offended by someone offering you cat tranquilizer when you just want some ganja, you shouldn’t be offended by someone who wants you to stick your dick in their ass whilst seeking pussy. You’re at the party and everyone is invited, just worry about coppin your piff.

Here’s a breakdown of who will be responding to your ad and how to sift through the bullshit.

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Sorry for party rocking

via UH

A Royale employee’s apparent indiscretion in dealing with a woman who really, really wanted to get back into a concert there on Jan. 18 earned the Theater District club a trip to the Boston Licensing Board to explain itself this morning.

Police say the woman, attending an 18+ show that night, told officers she was being escorted out of the club on Tremont Street for being too rowdy when a doorman suggested that if she “performed oral sex on him,” he’d slip her back in.

The employee insisted to police no such offer had been made, let alone fulfilled, but police Lt. Stephen Meade today gave the licensing board photos from the nearby Marriott showing the employee and the woman entering the men’s room there – and spending four minutes inside, along with an unidentified second man. “They then leave from the men’s room and walk in the direction of Royale,” Meade said.

A District A-1 sergeant and officer told the board their investigation – which included a detective from the sexual-assault unit – showed no force or coercion, that the woman freely told them she agreed to blow the guy in exchange for readmission. They added she appeared “very intoxicated,” but that she repeatedly declined their offers to file an assault complaint or get her medical attention.

Unfortunately for the woman and the worker, manager Brig Dauber met them in the lobby and wouldn’t let her go back inside.

Dauber testified that when he refused to let her back in, she got irate and said she was owed readmission because of the oral service she’d just provided the worker. “You need to let me in the concert right now,” he recalled her telling him. Dauber said that several of her friends joined in and began demanding she be let back in. Dauber, however, said he held his ground and called 911 as soon as the woman began talking about the trip to the Marriott men’s room.

Dauber said the worker, who did not attend the hearing, left Royale’s employ of his own accord not long after the incident.

The board decides Thursday what action, if any, to take.

#scumbaglife