The Official Pandering For Facebook “Likes”/Social Media “Follows” Post

Tuesday, April 30th, 2013

In a belated attempt to actually, you know, get people to look at this fucking blog, we thought of something completely original that will get our audience really excited: you now have permission to “Like” us on Facebook. The click you’ve been fiending for has finally arrived, and your life will never be quite the same again. Your reward? Temporary (seconds) satisfaction, and another way to access the shit ton of content and surprises we’re working on for the site, not to mention a meager payment to our criminally unrewarded staff (mainly ME). We get off on this shit.

 

JTTS on Facebook – “LIKE” US YOU BASTARDS

We also “Tweet” on The Twitter:

The mothership@jtts

el caballero_el_caballero

George@tha5elementz

Knife@djknife

ON&ON@dropitheavy

Sleezy Trees@slztrz

JK@jkrealize


JTTS @ 5: Our First Poast by Chris Faraone

Monday, March 25th, 2013

Reliving the classic first ever JTTS poast.

It’s pretty much stayed tru to the format for the last 4.7 years.

Five yurr anniversary coming up reeeeaal soon.

Here is teh poast from @Fara1 aka Faraoney. A JTTS Founder. Now deceased.

 

Before landing my first article in Spin, the highlight of my writing career was in third grade when I won the P.S. 32 poetry prize for a piece called “Winter Is…” In honor of my dominating the mid-eighties Queens public school literary scene, and in wanting to communicate to readers of our new blog what will be delivered all day every day on Jump The TurnStyle, I thought it was appropriate to un-vault the classic elementary school ellipsis format and add a little twist. This one is dedicated to Mr. Wilhelm, all the lunch ladies whose butter crunch cookies got me through my early school days, and the marijuana that enables me to dive into my stream of consciousness.

Jump The TurnStyle Is…

(more…)


NU E-MAIL

Thursday, November 29th, 2012

the view from our old g-mail inbox

 This shit smells like Malden.

Rather than clean up the mess we created, we are pretending like this never happened and hoping everyone else will too. It’s the American Way.

New Email

JTTSDOTCOM@GMAIL.COM

hit us up


JTTS.COM BOSTON MUSIC AWARDS TICKET GIVE AWAY CONTEST

Wednesday, November 28th, 2012

Poor JTTS.

Our fame reached a fever pitch this year some time around when Knife poasted about the time he was mugged by a roving gang of Jamaica Plain 12 year old’s.

I couldn’t go anywhere without chicks refusing to speak to me after reading about my last prostitute purchase.

I once saw Marty roll into the Good Life in fucking soccer shorts. I know why. He had that JTTS Swag Juice dripping off him.

Quincy coke dealers told Trees his money was no longer good with them. A.J. Wright promised JKFGT a life time supply of pink bandanas. People actually bought Faraone’s book. This blog was rollin.

The crowning jewel, yet another nomination for “Music Blog Of The Year” at The 2012 Boston Music Awards.

And then it happened. Blog Aids. Right in time for the voting process. Literally, a day before voting began. We finally fixed the site the day before voting ended. Like Yukonn entering a writing contest, we had no chance of winning.

However, we still get to engage in all the pageantry that comes with attending an awards show, and we want to share the experience with all 12 of our devoted readers. Trees is flying in from his new hometown of Tallahachee, or Gilbertville…somewhere deep in the woods of North Carolina.

Here’s your chance to spend an evening with your favorite JTTS personalities at a Boston awards show…Jesus…sounds more like a punishment.

Whoever answers the most questions accurately scores 2 tix to attend the Boston Music Awards, courtesy of JTTS.COM.

Come see us lose in person!

1.) What is Marty’s favorite Major League baseball team?

2.) What was the name of Faraone’s book chronicling the Occupy Boston movement?

3.) What kind of car does Trees drive?

4.) What YMCMB artist did Yukonn claim to discover, 6 years into his career?

5.) What duties did General Stoor have on set while working for a porn film company?

6.)  Name one M-Dot song.

7.) Which website do I use to score prostitutes escorts?

8.) JTTS started a national fire-storm by accusing a rapper of falsifying his chart-topping I-Tunes sales. Name the rapper.

9.) I almost got murdered by numerous people for banning a rapper from Boston with Edo G… Another JTTS story that shocked the nation. Name the rapper.

10.) What website fired Trees and I…. on fucking Labor Day?

LEAVE YOUR ANSWERS IN THE COMMENT SECTION.

Good luck, and we’ll see you this Sunday @ the Liberty Hotel!


Let’s Try This One Again…

Wednesday, November 21st, 2012

Strike us down with malware, and we shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.

Guess who’s back.

JTTS.

Annoying, obnoxious, unruly and poised for either greatness or a wasted life, just like the five year old brats we are.

What Trees wrote is somewhat true: at some point, the collective give-a-fuck of everyone involved in JTTS dropped down to the depths of apathy usually reserved for albums on Faraone’s year-end “Best Of” list. We came agonizingly close to going out for cigarettes and never coming back while the little blog we made sat roasting in the car.

Then two things that I never thought would get me to give a fuck about anything, let alone this digital beast I co-created with Sleezy Trees and Faraone over PBRs at Tommy Doyle way back in 2008, came to the rescue: DJ Knife and the Boston Music Awards.

I look at the other blogs nominated for BMAs this year and it makes me cringe just a little bit. Not because they are bad, quite the opposite; from what I know, our esteemed fellow nominees are non-professional writers and music fans who do their work in the local scene without the promise of any (significant) financial gain. They also manage to go for months, even years at a time without succumbing to malware infections, which you know, can be a big help to people who want to, er, visit your site.

Meanwhile, what are we to do? Our staff only consists of two professional writers, two professional DJs, a regional marketing manager for a major American company and one (sometime) dude who spends both his real and fake life almost entirely on the Internet. (Editor’s Note: JKFGT do you still exist? I haven’t seen you in the physical no homo for over a year. Please drop us a note if you have moved on or gotten sucked into Tron or become one with the Force or whatever).

I should note we also have a web guy—shouts to JD the check is in the mail homie—who we gave a chunk of the ‘company’ (don’t laugh) at the beginning of the year and is basically on call to fix shit when we need, which is (un)surprisingly often.

Really, we should have a few BMAs and Source Awards by now.

But the bottom line: everything happens for a reason.

Trees moves to North Carolina and starts blogging like he’s broke eating toothpaste and almonds for dinner again.

ON&ON gets chin checked by a jacked up baby sitter and lives to ride off on Bernie and blog about it.

Knife doesn’t blog at all yet is the one who shakes us all out of our collective hibernation.

Faraone realizes the presidential election is over and shifts his sweaty rage from Mitt Romney back towards myself and Trees, promising to “bury you two assholes in a JTTS post” for thinking the Kendrick Lamar album was “even decent.”

Plus, our monthly party Fresh Produce at Good Life is a strong contender for a second consecutive “Best Dance Night” award at the BMAs, thanks to Knife, Tommee, Peter and everyone at GL.

As for me, well, I’m home in DC for Thanksgiving and bored and sober, so at least that’s a start.

In other words, we are operating at about 10% of total blog swag levels and we’re still getting good traffic and award nominations.

I guess we got the juice now.


JKFGT AND KNIFE LURED MY #RARE SON TO A LIL B SHOW (SMH)

Sunday, September 30th, 2012

JTTS.COM contributors DJ Knife and JKFGTEPMDNWA were instrumental in orchestrating Lil B’s live performance in The Bridge last night.

 There is a rumored photo of JK______ and my son (who paid for a $25  ticket) together  at the all ages event.

MORE DETAILS TO FOLLOW…

UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE!

CLICK BELOW TO SEE HOW SLEEZY TREES CONDUCTS HIMSELF AT A LIL B SHOW

ROB BASED

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE!!! 

There they are…my son, Cash Lover From Da East Side, and JKFGT, thumbing their noses at the blood sweat and tears men like Kool G. Rap and KRS 1 endured to make this an America where a no talent hack like Lil B can demand $25 for the general public to witness him rap…and sell the damn venue out.

Today is a new day. The horror.


SLEEZY TREES PRETTY MUCH THE ILLEST MARKETING GUY IN THE HIP-HOP UNIVERSE RIGHT NOW.

Tuesday, September 25th, 2012

Sleezy Trees and his cohorts over at getondown.com are murking the hip-hop merch game as of late. Boogie Down Productions puzzles, ODB wallets, OB4CL shrines…they got the innanet goin nuts.
Story of my life…Trees builds two websites, one of them a revolutionary exercise in marketing rap music, the other, a site where M-Dot and a scooter named Maxine are regularly featured. And which one do I get involved with?

Here we see a robust DJ Delz geeked from his  getondown.com purchase that just arrived in the mail:


JTTS HIP-HOP TRIVIA RETURNS TO GOOD LIFE!!!

Thursday, August 23rd, 2012

Getondown.com, PBR, The Good Life, and JTTS bring you a night that promises to be forever etched into your liquor soaked hip-hop mammalian brain.

Rap trivia nerds unite at this annual Gathering Of The Thuggalo’s.

Past categories include “Jews In Hip-Hop”, “Connecticutt…No One Goes There Unless They Have To”, and “Hip-Hop Cinema”.

And the coup de grace…THE MUTHAFUCKIN PHYSICAL CHALLENGE IS BACK!!!!

….And the prizes are BANANAS!

Immediately after,  DJ Reel Drama and I drop it heavy all night as we celebrate our double cd release party.

To lock in your 4 man team, register at 7. Trivia tee-time is 8pm sharp.

Last night I appeared on the homey Dana Scott’s weekly radio show, “Musenomix”on WMBR 88.1FM to drop a tribute to EPMD  and to discuss #HipHopTriviaNight. Forward to 8:20 to listen to the full 2 hour episode.

And to hear me make my rap debut, go to 1:56:20.


FRESH PRODUCE WITH NINA SKY THIS SATURDAY!

Tuesday, August 21st, 2012

JTTS  is helping to bring those fine sisters (literally) of Nina Sky to Good Life this Saturday for a special Dj set at Fresh Produce.

Our friends at Bud Light Platinum hooked it up too, so the cost is only $5.

Dj’s Frank White, Knife, and Tommee spinning 2 Chainz inspired music all night.

Now get them puters putin,  and tune in to www.freshproduceboston.com.


JTTS is Never Going To Die.

Tuesday, August 14th, 2012

Summer re-runs muhfukka. Who inside Blogging? We turn up the heat in the winter and make shit happen.

I’m working on a site redesign as we speak.

Marty is mad close to getting some revenue coming in, he’s been working on it for close to 2 years now, I am sure it’s right around the corner.

DJ ON&ON has agreed to my terms of a formatting discussion to take his poast game up several notches.

Fara1 is working on another book, so he’ll probably leech off our traffic to promote in a few months.

Yukonn is thankfully no longer blogging here it seems like. That’s a huge win for the site..

JKFGT is being JKFGT

DJ Knife still alive.

We out here son.

We out here..

 


FRESH PRODUCE 6 YEAR ANNIVERSARY WITH 9TH WONDER THIS SATURDAY!

Monday, July 23rd, 2012

Shouts to Tommee, Knife, Trees, Peter, and UGHH for 6 years of  drunken hip-hop memories.


I think I am over Twitter..

Monday, June 25th, 2012

24 hours after actively tweeting using my twitter account @slztrz .. I have noticed one thing.

Shit is boring as fuck unless people are interacting with you.

It’s hard to get people to interact with you when you only have 18 followers.

Therefore, I am permanently retiring from Tweetering until I hit 45 followers. That is a modest goal, but a highly attainable and realistic one nonetheless.

If you want to continue seeing pure tweet gold like this:

or this

or even this..

Tell a foe or a friend to follow ya boy.

UPDATE: I think I may have spoke too soon.

(more…)


Tracy, Tova, Candice, Frenchi, Ralph, Lela..

Monday, June 25th, 2012

Follow the god Sleezy Trees on the Tweetbox.

@SLZTRZ

I have 11 followers.

I need you.

I know you blacks are into that shit.

I promise to use alot of hashtags and the acronym ”SMH” alot.