Bitch, Get Out The F’n Kitchen & Make Me Some Music
Posted on November 17, 2008 by Sleezy Trees
We all know women are good for essentially 3 things:
Fucking. Cooking. and Cleaning.
But did you know that some women possess a startling fourth degree of usefulness? Yes, some women actually have talent that goes well beyond getting my dinner my ready, or making sure that my khakis are pressed. At some point in time the good lord gave women the ability to make music, and some of these bitches can make music pretty god damn good.
Now Imma preface this by saying I essentially *hate* hearing females rap, but for every Queen Latifiah coaster I’ve ever stumpled across, there are 15 talented songbirds waiting to lace my iPod with vocals that don’t involve nagging & complaining. Ok.. there is still an awful lot of complaining going on in most of these joints, but thankfully there hasn’t been a song directed at me (yet).
Yes, there is nothing like the sultry voice of some heartbroken whooo-re over some well crafted instrumentation and the following is by no means a “best-of” list. Rather I’m posting this with every intention of putting some of youse on to these birds. Let’s begin:
DOWNLOAD: Irene Kral – Going To California
For some reason I’ve always had a soft spot for Irene Kral (maybe because she looks like Mike TeeVee’s mom from Willie Wonka & The Chocolate factory). I’ve liked this song for a few reasons, namely Irene’s dreams that moving to California is going to solve all of her problems is essentially “Joe Sixpax” ultimate last gamble in escaping any shitty situation, WHEREVER you live in America. Also, if I owned the liscensing to this song I’d be shopping it like a motherfuck. It would go perfect as the score to one of those fly-over head, showing the car driving on a highway movie segue-ways to California.
DOWNLOAD: Brenda Russell – A Little Bit Of Love
Not to be confused with New Edition’s A Little Bit Of Love — which has absolutely nothing to do with this other than the title. Anyone with a slight ear for music can instantly recognize the Big Pun sample in the beginning. This is just some upbeat, feel good neo soul, that I usually throw on while I baby powder my balls each morning. A great way to start the day.
DOWNLOAD: The Bamboos feat. Alice Russell – Bring It Home
Now I’m not really sure what you call this. Neo-Soul, Nu-Soul, Modern Soul, Funk? Whatever. The Bamboos have been killing it for a minute on the funky shit. Here they team up with one of my hands down favorites right now; Alice Russell. In this number, Alice bascially tells her boyfriend to “bring it home”, meaning, she wants to get fucked! YES! P.S. unlike the other gems I posted — this is essentially brand new. I think it dropped earlier this past summer. So unlike Irene Kral, Alice is still alive. Go see her show if she comes around your area.
DOWNLOAD: Alice Smith – Woodstock
Great song. Alice Smith is depressed, NYC is getting her down. She takes a trip upstate to Woodstock for a little R&R and comes back refreshed. Pretty simple shit. Enjoy it. She’s also hot (that’s her in the picture @ the top of this post).
DOWNLOAD: Bahamadia & Rah Digga – Be Ok
So after listening to the above and then playing this joint, I think you can understand why I think girls don’t belong in rap. I’m not saying this is bad, Bahamadia and Digga are pretty much the only two femcees I’ve consistently tolerated (I especially hate the word “femcee”). Anyway, here they team up. I thought it was only right to include a rap joint. It was this or Amanda Blank (sorry Kid Sis).
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Yes, Alice Smith is hot, I’ve seen her live twice. You left out Adele, Esthero, Janelle Monae, Joi, Res (still alive), and Imani Coppola (wrote a lot of Alice Smith’s album.
i smell a part two
Good list, I woulda just added Janelle Monae, like Dance said.