RIP Paul Pierce

Statistically, aside from Bill Russell, the greatest Celtic to hit the Irish parquet.

Wish he could have retired a Celtic, but in this day and age, binnez comes first, and Daniel Ainge did what he had to do.

DJ Knife, you following all this?

Salute to Paul and his awkward ass facial hair.

Fuck you to the chick I was dating that attended one of his notorious pool parties in Wellesley that sucked Gerald Green’s dick and admitted it to me while sobbing on her period. She dropped devastating news on me, while robbing me of the opportunity to administer revenge/hate sex on her. Chicks seem to have this crazy hang up of porking while depressed and gushing blood. I couldn’t watch a Celtics game for 2 months.

I imagine Bob Cousy will give a similar speech when they raise that trey quatro into the rafters.

9 Responses to “RIP Paul Pierce”

  1. DJ ON&ON Says:

    …And no dummies, he’s not dead. My headlines are more sensational than my hairline.

  2. Sleezytrees Says:

    Someone is off the wagon.

  3. DJ ON&ON Says:

    Come on…Paul Pierce having fun with a Boston accent? That’s good stuff.
    No worse than a poast about The Weeknd’s upcoming tour dates.

  4. Egadz Says:

    What was with the Jacob Marley wrap in the top pic?

  5. DJ ON&ON Says:

    That was the legendary night against the Pacers Paul claimed to have been savagely punched in the jaw (it was a total flop) and showed up at the after game press conference in a crudely applied head bandage claiming the refs missed him being assaulted. Boston press wanted to run him out of town after that stunt.

  6. Egadz Says:

    Hahahaha yes!! Dude’s theatrics were top notch!

  7. mr.murph Says:

    yes pauly will be sorely missed and he’s still my favorite active player in the nba and it seemed like he even better after the rso stabbing from which he almost died. but are you really gonna put him over bird? it goes russell bird than paul. after 12 beers it becomes bird bird & mchale. and maybe havlichek

  8. DJ ON&ON Says:

    Pierce has more points and three pointers than Larry. Not sure about other categories, but I’m sure he’s got him on rebounds. Only major argument to be made for Bird is more rings.

  9. mr.murph Says:

    yea i was checking stats. pierce got him beat in alotta catagories. their basically the same type of player who can do everything on the court. i give the nod to larry cuz of the 3 rings. i can talk hoops allday. i fuckin love b-ball. its gonna be tuff watching games this year but i think they made some good moves. the c’s got the best vibe of the city. nothing compares to a night out in the bean at the c’s game with the post game wrap up

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