Prelude To The Gayest Event In America This Week… Including Jason Collins’ Announcement.

Tuesday, April 30th, 2013

I’m 38 years old. I’ve weathered the deep dark valleys, and sunshine filled mountain tops of romance with the opposite gender time and time again.

Admittedly, when it comes to relationships, I’ve embarked on some clear cut suicide missions. Signed up for 3-5 year bids with some of Boston’s most unsavory life partner candidates.

Thick thighs, a bottomless tight pussy, and a penchant for cheap Vodka being my main criterion in wifing a chick…I can see where I’ve set my standards a little low.

Mother, if you’re reading this…please stop, and pick up The Economist. Jesus Christ.

(more…)


Danny Brown On Some Serious G Shit

Tuesday, April 30th, 2013

Is anyone impressed by anything these days? I mean really… I feel like I have already seen it all because of the internet, but for what it’s worth – getting a sick blowie from a groupie whilst performing on stage is probably the biggest G move of 2013.

Props to Daniel Brown.


Cambridge Resident Owns Alex Jones Flunkie

Tuesday, April 30th, 2013

Dan Bidondi is covering the Boston Bombing media marathon in Boston for Alex Jones’ conspiracy friendly Info Wars network.
A Cambridge resident armed with a camera called him out on the fact he thinks the F.B.I. blew people up.

Side note: 4 people dead 170 injured in Boston = $30 Million in donations. (Thank you, America.)
14 people dead, 200 injured in Texas = Barely $2 Million in donations. (Thank you, Willy Nelson.)

Anyone find this a bit foul odd?


My Frog Just Died

Tuesday, April 30th, 2013

Darrius passed away 5 minutes ago. He was 1 years old. The African Dwarf Frog almost survived the harsh New England winter but is now swimming down the toilet towards his final destination in Frog Heaven. He is survived by his brother Gary and his roommates’ Me, Ashleigh, Melissa and JKLXVNIN. Circle of life bruh.  Please pour one out for Darrius tonight where ever the evening may take you.


The Official Pandering For Facebook “Likes”/Social Media “Follows” Post

Tuesday, April 30th, 2013

In a belated attempt to actually, you know, get people to look at this fucking blog, we thought of something completely original that will get our audience really excited: you now have permission to “Like” us on Facebook. The click you’ve been fiending for has finally arrived, and your life will never be quite the same again. Your reward? Temporary (seconds) satisfaction, and another way to access the shit ton of content and surprises we’re working on for the site, not to mention a meager payment to our criminally unrewarded staff (mainly ME). We get off on this shit.

 

JTTS on Facebook – “LIKE” US YOU BASTARDS

We also “Tweet” on The Twitter:

The mothership@jtts

el caballero_el_caballero

George@tha5elementz

Knife@djknife

ON&ON@dropitheavy

Sleezy Trees@slztrz

JK@jkrealize


DOOM x Clams Casino – “Bookfiend” [Audio]

Tuesday, April 30th, 2013

The supervillain needs the right accomplices. There’s the good ones, like Madlib and Ghostface, who complement DOOM’s weirdness and add their own. And then there are collaborations that look promising on paper but fizzle on wax. Exhibit A and B: Thom Yorke and Jneiro Jarel. I wanted to like Keys to the Cuff, but the busy, glitchy production never synched up with DOOM’s fragmented flow.

The latest henchman, Clams Casino, gives DOOM the space he needs. “Bookfiend” is all lazy synth stabs and ambient drums, the perfect backdrop for the Villain’s bizarre bars: “Taste stale/see the world in shades of grayscale.” Who else could say that with a straight face and sound ill?

Here’s to hoping DOOM snaps his string of underwhelming projects.


A New Benchmark in Failure – NH Man Loses Life Savings Playing Carnie Games [Video]

Tuesday, April 30th, 2013

[The OG video has been removed from YouTube, but you can still see it here].

We’ve all been there–staring across at the rubber bucket, the glass milk bottle, or the hopelessly mis-sized basketball hoop with the certainty that where thousands of other players have failed, we would succeed in turning our hard earned cash into a big fucking stuffed panda at the carnival game booth, thus beating the system and proving that even within this cruel, dispassionate universe, the strength of one man’s will could momentarily supersede the cold, rigid laws of physics and carnival economics.

Or not.

Because in real life, unless you’re a cute girl or little kid playing one of these games, those laws never fail. Newton’s rules of physics always apply, as does the old adage “Never lose your life savings to a carnie at the ‘Tubs of Fun’ booth.”

Aside from ticking off every box in the list of stereotypes about people who lose their life savings at a parking lot carnival, Henry Gribbohm is haunted with the constant reminder of his failure: a big stuffed dreadlocked banana, fated to haunt him forever with his mouth twisted into a mocking smile.

In other words, I’m sure your day could be worse.

 


Life Is An Emotional Rollercoaster.

Monday, April 29th, 2013



About a month ago, I received a mysterious DM on Twitter with a YouTube link to a fascinating 20-view video. Less than 2 weeks later, the video skyrocketed up to 20,000+ and continues to grow…

While most of you are still nursing deep cut wounds from the days of Budden’s Mood Muzik or coping with the fact that Slug is happy now, a new generation of sadness has arrived. Just 16 years old and hailing from Stockholm, Yung Lean Doer and the #sadboys will make you soul search. Why is he so sad, you ask? Because Lil B isn’t in Stockholm with him. Fair.

It’s very hard to process what’s going on here. For example, in the video for “PLASTIC G-SHOCK,” Yung Lean waves his gun around leaving most viewers a little on edge, not knowing the result of this emotional situation. While biting on the barrel, chills will run down your spine. The Based World has birthed another one. A mystery? A prophecy? A mockery? You decide. As I cook to these videos in my dark room, I too, am unsure about the future of Yung Lean Doer. I relate to his pain, his love for Arizona Iced Tea, and pray for his happiness. Enjoy. One love.


YUNG LEAN – PLASTIC G-SHOCK // prod yung sherman //



YUNG LEAN – GINSENG STRIP 2002 // prod. yung gud shorty



UPDATE: BRAND NEW VIDEO
YUNG LEAN – OREOMILKSHAKE //e m o t i o n a l // prod yung gud shorty




For more from Yung Lean -> YouTube


Slaine On MTV: Distances Vinny Paz From Boston Bombers

Monday, April 29th, 2013


Sco Dough x Captain Kirk [Video]

Monday, April 29th, 2013

Boston has so many identities as far as rap music is concerned…is that a good or bad thing?

Here, Sco Dough brings us to Boston trap mode. Get ready to be beamed up. Captain Kirk.


Catch Wreck x Is He ILL [Video]

Monday, April 29th, 2013

Shouts to the homey Catch Wreck who hit us up on our new Facebook page to share his new video.

Catch Wreck is good money, and is a Boston mc who embraces dabbling in different styles/genres/galaxies.

Support him, and our new Facebook page. Thank you.


Get Ready for The Beastie Book

Monday, April 29th, 2013

It’s true: white people love coffee table books. There’s nothing better than sipping your coffee from your coffee table lazily flipping through your coffee table book, which accomplishes the task of making you look really cool and smart for doing nothing better than staring at mostly big color photos and skimming some text you’ll soon forget. It’s hipster-ness defined.

And what group could be better at bringing a wry smile to the face of the aging hipster at their coffee tables than this news: the surviving Beastie Boys (Ad-Rock and Mike D) have just signed a deal with Random House for a book “celebrating their history and aesthetic,” according to the New York Times.

What we know is this: former ego trip editor Sacha Jenkins will oversee the project (released by subdivision Spiegel & Grau, of Jay-Z “Decoded” fame), and it will be a loose oral history of the group with contributions from other writers, something more of a “multidimensional experience” than a straight memoir (perhaps like the short-lived Grand Royal mag, they say). Oh, and lot’s of pictures.

What we don’t know: much else, as it’s slated for 2015. Start shopping for that perfect coffee table now.

 


N.T.F.O. To This

Sunday, April 28th, 2013

I reached dangerous levels of nerdocity last night, as I was in my glory glued to C-Span watching The White House Correspondent’s Dinner.

For those from Brockton, it’s the annual White House roast session where all of media comes together to basically watch a roast.

Bill O’reilley, Tavis Smiley, and Arianna Huffington all in the same room getting shit on.

I literally lol’d throughout Obama and Conan’s routines.

Light one up and N.T.F.O. (Nerd The Fuck Out)

Barry came out to “All I Do Is Win” and set shit off with a rap joke. Crack.