Because I’m So Full of Pride This Morning Even Though It Could Still All Go Bad…

If there was any season in which Faraone should have taken up the Sox Mobster title in full force, this was it.

While he’s out live Tweeting every time a protestor farts in Mitt Romney’s general direction, the Sox…do I even need to say it? Is it possible that after killing Andrew Breitbart, he focused his psycho kinetic powers on Bobby Valentine and Adrian Gonzalez, two hapless fools who would be marching next to him with the rest of the 99% if they didn’t know how to throw a ball and/or invent a sandwich? If so, I can only tip my cartoon Oriole hat to you sir.

First place bitches. The Orioles, yes. Like it says in the picture above.

Now stop me if this sounds familiar: a team with a large blue-collar fan base and rich baseball tradition endures years of disappointment, disfunction and failure. The fans, while still loyal, become embittered and hardened by the experience, as they watch teams in their same division bring home championship titles. The arrogance and power of these teams instills an us-against-the-world attitude in both the club and its fans. Then, thanks to the work of new management, things start to turn around. Using the siege mentality forged from years of failure, a team of mostly unheralded veterans and young players fighting for their futures starts to mount a substantial challenge to the established powers. As that team rises, the big teams, bloated by big egos, high salaries, poor management and a sense of self-satisfaction with their prior achievements, is exposed and falls from grace in spectacular fashion.

How’d you like that long paragraph? I’ll make it easier: the 2004 Red Sox and the current Orioles team ain’t that far apart (the Yankees never trade places with anyone…they are always the villain).

It should also be noted that the guy who built the 2004 team, Theo Epstein Dan Duquette, now works on Eutaw Street.

But don’t worry: the bandwagon still has plenty of room for late-comers, considering the O’s are only pulling in around 10,000 people to come see them smash teams with double their payroll on a nightly basis. But trust me buddy: once people are resigned to accept the whims of whichever reptillian overlord the Illuminati deems worthy of being a puppet president, there will always be baseball. In October. In Baltimore.

As for Red Sox fans, at least now you have something in common with people in Liverpool.

6 Responses to “Because I’m So Full of Pride This Morning Even Though It Could Still All Go Bad…”

  1. Sleezy Trees Says:

    Baseball is still on TV?

    I didn’t even notice because I was too busy shining my faux-Vince Lombardi trophy in honor of the New York Mother Fucking Football Giants two Superbowl championships in 5 years.

    For a real sport, tune into NBC tonight and watch the Cowboys get decimated by the most elite athlete in all of professional sports, that’s right bitches: Eli Manning.

  2. el caballero Says:

    agreed, the Giants are the most dominant team in the history of Super Bowls That Don’t Involve the Ravens

  3. mr.murph Says:

    i see where your going with this politically but fuck the orioles. its a fuckin bird/thunder chicken ugly ass logo. go sawx

  4. JKLXVNIN Says:

    Not that I give a shit, but why are there more Sox fans in Camden Yards than Orioles’ fans? Still.

  5. el caballero Says:

    I could write a book about the deep hatred that rises within me when I see obnoxious ass Sox fans piling into my beloved Camden Yards like they were straight off the T Commuter Boat from Hingham. Fuck y’all. Come in and spend all your money, watch the Sox get their ass beat, then take your Dunkies and go the fuck home.

  6. wite Says:

    yankees never dropped out of 1st and the O’s never took sole position of 1st

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